I'm not afraid to die...and if you aren't either...maybe you should stop eating bran muffins! ha.

On a serious note, I'm headed tomorrow back to Emory first thing in the morning to have my breast ultrasound to determine if the 3 lumps they found are just cysts. I believe whatever they call them.....lumps, bumps, cysts that they are beign. I tend to have a sense when something is terribly wrong and I just don't get that feeling about this. So, I guess I would be surprised if I heard anything other than,.....nothing to worry about....go home you lumpy, bumpy thing! ha. Thanks to Greg and Rosa for their offer to take me tomorrow on their day off. So many have offered to take me back and forth to Emory. Typically it is a very long day starting early as 7 am. and lasting until 4 p.m. so most of the time, my family has been able to take me. Thank you to those who have volunteered. There may be a time we need your help but so far, I've had enough family members with available time to take me.

Of course, this is also the day to remove my chemo pump. All night long you hear this pump run. It sounds like a small motor. However, I have to make sure it runs or else my chemo infusion time runs beyond 50 hrs. Ugh! I'm getting a little more used to it being attached to my chest. Although I tend to go off and leave it....most of the time, one of my kids will notice just before it gives me the big jerk! All I hear is MOMMMMMMM and I instantly remember that I have a fanny pack attached to my chest. Now why do they have a fanny pack attached to my chest....isn't that the wrong name??? Shouldn't it be called something cute, like.."chesty pack?" You know something a little more original? :-) I think I'm going to name it....after all, we are going to be friends for awhile so I must humanize it and give it a cute name. I'm open to suggestions.

On another serious note that I've been discussing with my sister-in-law and that is death. To many this seems to be such a morbid, unforbidden subject. I don't feel that way at all. In fact, I had someone say to me, "soon you won't fear dying"....and I immediately said, "I don't fear dying right now".....are you kidding me? I don't want to die nor do I think I'm going to die anytime before I'm old and rotten but I do not fear it. I've lived for God my whole life and the peace that comes with knowing that someday I will actually get to meet my Lord and Saviour, all my family members that beat me there and seeing no suffering, people are whole, no disabilities, no pain.....can't you imagine what heaven must be like? Look at what the earth has to offer in comparison? Look at the turmoil we are in right now.....I certainly do not want to leave earth or my family but to say I would fear going to heaven....you gotta be crazy! When it is my time....Beam me up SCOTTIE! I'm ready and willing. I received this cute cartoon tonight which went with exactly this thought and I thought it was cute that I just had to share....now if you want to prolong your time on earth, you know exactly what to do....


Bran Muffins
The couple were 85 years old, and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies. Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade. One day, their good health didn't help when they went on a rare vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven.
They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet. They gasped in astonishment when he said, 'Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now.' The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. 'Why, nothing,' Peter replied, 'remember, this is your reward in Heaven.' The old man looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built on Earth. 'What are the greens fees?,' grumbled the old man . 'This is heaven,' St. Peter replied. 'You can play for free, every day.' Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, free flowing beverages. 'Don't even ask,' said St. Peter to the man. This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy.' The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his wife. 'Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods, and the decaffeinated tea?,' he asked. 'That's the best part,' St. Peter replied. 'You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like, and you will never get fat or sick. This is Heaven!' The old man pushed, 'No gym to work out at?' 'Not unless you want to,' was the answer. 'No testing my sugar or blood pressure or...' 'Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself.' The old man glared at his wife and said, 'You and your bran muffins. We could have been here ten years ago!'

Now we know the secrets to getting to heaven quicker....we'll all be signed up as regular customers to the Varsity!! ha.

Today is my second day of chemo and I've not been totally on top of my game but God has given me rest and peace today.

Remember to make this day another great day!
Love, Leah